Sunday, January 17, 2010

Romancing the Stone

Back in the 80s, one of my very favorite movies was "Romancing the Stone". It was on one of the cable movie channels and thankfully, my parents had actually paid the add'l money on their cable bill to have a movie channel. I taped the movie ... yes, TAPE, we're talking VHS times here ... and watched it over and over. It's such a clever movie, snarky comments at the right moments, witty repartee, lovely romance ... it made me fall in love with romance over and over again. It's still on my Top 10 list of favorite flicks.

What's romance to me these days? Let me cast my vague memory back to various romantic things that have happened to me over the years. I remember a fleeting 2-week romance in Switzerland when I did my summer "work abroad" program back in 1982. J was an American I met who was at some fencing tournament or something in the same town I lived. We met at one of the local bars and really hit it off. His romantic move (in my mind) was to hold my face in hands, stare into my eyes and kiss me. Yep, my girlfriends and I called that the "J----" for years. Soft, sweet, romantic.

C does romance his way. Like bringing home some chocolate he saw at work and hiding it behind his back and making me close my eyes before giving it to me. Or cutting a flower from the rosebush outside, putting it in a small vase and placing it on my desk. When we first starting seeing each other, we were mad emailers. I still have every one of C's emails and when I'm in a mood, I read the ones from the beginning of our courtship and get all gushy inside. I love those emails. Since we're married now, we have less of that and on consideration, I think I actually miss that.

Since this is my blog and my feelings and my thoughts, here are some more things I think are romantic, even though they don't usually happen. Flowers. Cliché but oh, so wonderful. I love getting flowers, whether a small bouquet from the supermarket or a lovely arrangement delivered to my office. I think I'm going to tell C that for our first anniversary, I don't want a gift, just a recreation of my bridal bouquet in flower arrangement from the florist who did our wedding flowers. That's really all I want.

Snuggling. Don't let anyone tell you snuggling isn't romantic. Just sitting on the couch watching a movie with the lights out and snuggling. If the world snuggled more, I think we'd have less war and strife. I'm serious!

Kissing. Wow. A bad kisser is a deal-breaker. How lucky am I that C is a fantastic kisser? Very lucky. I've kissed bad kissers before and blech! what a downer. No tongue, too much tongue, too anxious, too reticent. Never the right amount of anything. Sure there've been some great kissers sprinkled throughout here and there, but I'm so glad that C is an "A-#1" kisser. I mean, that would have been difficult to overcome. I remember my sister telling me once "just discuss it with (Mr. X) and tell him you like to be kissed this way or that way". Right. Like that's not an awkward conversation. I mean, doesn't everyone feel like they're a good kisser? Who wants to be told "You suck and not in a good way?" Long, slow kisses that don't have to lead to anything, quick kisses to say "I love you", urgent kisses because you just want to ... they're all in the arsenal. No need to stockpile.

Holding hands in public. Yes, PDA. I think that's one of those "girl" things. It's our way of marking our territory, perhaps. I like to feel C's thumb rub over my hand. When I'm 60, 70 or 80, I still want to hold hands with C. That would make me happy.

Romance isn't dead in this world. I think it's just on a little vacation.

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